15 11 / 2013
Fuck, the muggles got me down. Expecto patronum didn’t do shit. Let’s just skip to the chocolate.
11 11 / 2013
bitch you lack so much class marx declared you a utopia
10 11 / 2013
I always thought that me having only a few very good friends was a good thing. Unfortunately in the past year or so those few friends have either outgrown me or I have outgrown them.
I think the latter, because when I really seem to need them to just be there for me, they disappear into thin air. I’m surely not the greatest friend there is, heck I can be a real pain in my own annoying way.
But damn sure I’m there when they need me. I then make that day or week all about them until they feel better.
The part that hurts the most is that in the past year I opened up a great deal to those close friends about my depression and anxiety. That wasn’t something that was easy for me to do.
They were sympathetic of course. But they don’t understand that just by addressing my problems they won’t go away! I work really hard and sometimes I slip back down that horribly scary hill I’m trying to climb up.
And times like that I need them the most. But when their priorities don’t have me as high up the list as I would’ve had them on, that is though.
So what I’m trying to say is: Sure, of course I understand you can’t hang out because of schoolwork. No, it’s fine! I’ll just sob with myself then.
Oh you already made plans with your boyfriend. No you’re right I should’ve planned my melt-down a week ago, then maybe….
And my all time favorite: Well, it’s okay that you can’t hang out because you don’t feel all that great. Under the weather huh, a little cold? Well you get back in bed. No, no I totally mean it when I say it’s not a big deal, why would I lie? I mean I already feel like a waste of space and in the way of everyone, so why would I ever want to be an inconvenience to you?!
Don’t even think twice about how I’m doing because I totally just said that it’s fine to your obviously rhetorical question if I’d mind?
Even now I feel like a bad friend for typing my feelings so bluntly. But I’m feeling very alone right now and this helps a lot. Maybe I won’t even post this. If I do, please don’t judge based on this solely.
I really try not to be a shitty person most of the time, but I seem to forget every time that it doesn’t matter how other people feel about me when in the meantime I can’t even stand myself.
Self love is new for me, but I’ve decided that the people most important to me, my friends (my family too but well, that’s a whole other issue), should try to be as supportive and loving towards me as I so often actively try to be towards them.
So please, please, PLEASE, see this as a sign that when you’re feeling alone as much as I do, it doesn’t always have to mean that YOU are doing something terribly wrong.
YOU do indeed deserve better and YOU shouldn’t put yourself down.
EXPECT WHAT YOU GIVE, GIVE WHAT YOU WOULD WANT TO GET.
YOU DESERVE BETTER, SO THEN GO AND GET WHAT’S BETTER!
21 10 / 2013
- accept that no pun is actually Good, but that the true nature of a good pun is to be so terrible that it becomes good.
- say every pun that occurs to you. i’m so serious about this, sometimes the most well received puns will be ones you considered not saying.
- ALWAYS laugh at your own puns, even if nobody else is. (especially if nobody else is.)
- know that you are hilarious. puns are a limitless resource and you have taken it as your duty to bring this gift to humanity. you are a hero.